Rumbly In My Tumbly

Published 3 April, 2009 by itsaheartache

Remember Winnie The Pooh?  What a big yellow dope.  I always thought he was selfish.  Hmph.

Don’t know why I all of a sudden resorted to insults of Pooh, perhaps I should have my cattiness evaluated.

Work Bully is in rare form today… I thought we were making progress but alas, HUGE bulls-eye right on my back.  Whatever makes her happy – I’m not going to let it bother me.  I’m here to do a job and that’s it.  I don’t have to like her and I don’t have to agree with her.  If she wants to be angry and mean all the time, who am I to stop her? 

The past couple of weeks have flown by.  There isn’t really anything new going aside from my fantastic boyfriend.  We are spending as much time together as we can, which is hard since I live with my brother and we live about a half hour away from each other.  Saturdays have worked out quite well, as well as quick visits during the week.  He’s all I can think about a lot of the time, which is terrifying.  (Just jump already, I don’t know what I am waiting for!!)

I think the boys’ dad has lost his job in some form.  If it’s anything like usual, he has quit.  I haven’t gotten child support in near a month now, which sucks.  Especially now.  I am making dirt.  I’m hoping that something just gives soon.  I’m tired of the constant struggle.  Yes, it makes me a better person but damn it.

From what Donald has said, later this year like in the fall, he plans on going out of state for work for about 6 months.  This would mean I would have the girls for about 6 months.  I enjoy time with them, but I am worried about the financial aspect of this.  Babysitter, extra food, oye.  I’m already panicking and nothing is even set in stone yet!!

I’m ready to be moved.  I had a little bit of money saved but I have an eye doctor appointment for the youngest boy tomorrow, and middle boy has a tooth bugging him so that will be a trip to the old dentist.  Joy!  It never ends, huh?

My book has stalled.  I haven’t had any real focus time since I moved so I have let it fall to the back burner.  Not to worry, I will pick it back up when I can, and work on editing and adding to it.   The completed chapters have names now, which is always a good thing.  It’s nice to see it coming together.  I only wish I could sit and think for 5 seconds without all these other thoughts flooding in.   Soon, I hope.

I have 3 more months to go to meet my move out goal of July 1.  I don’t see any reason why I can’t accomplish this goal as long as I keep my job and I keep everyone happy.  April is not going to be a stellar month for saving, as I have the wedding and bachelorette party coming up.  If I can make it through this month without having a complete breakdown it will be a miracle.  Especially now that I’m out another 400 dollars a month almost. 

I know it will all be OK.  I just want it to be OK right now.

More updates to come.


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