Published 7 September, 2008 by itsaheartache

“If there’s nothing there to make things change; if it’s the same to you I’ll just hang”… Matchbox 20

Life deals us unfair hands most of the time.  For those of us lucky enough to never encounter struggle, it’s hard to understand how the other half lives.  I’m the other half.  Many stumbling blocks have presented themselves.  Sometimes in a series; much like chatter bumps on an old gravel road.

Experience has told me that the road commission visits seasonally to grate over the bumps; but budget constraints limit their frequency.  What a bummer.

Right now I could use some gravel.

I’m 30 and having a hard time figuring out this grown up thing.  My life has been full of lows and highs.  Fewer highs, but alas, what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, no?

I am raising 5 terrific, bright, fantastic children.  Every parent thinks their kids are the best, but seriously.  Mine are pretty damn terrific.  Smart, articulate, thoughtful, charismatic.  I love them all differently and as individuals.

I grew up with parents who were less than terrific, and so I don’t have much to go off when making decisions regarding my children.  The best thing I have figured out is how I DON’T want to raise them.  So far this has turned out well.  My oldest son, though, is a bit argumentative.  I think it has a lot to do with the age (13 going on 40).  I keep forgetting that once a kid becomes a teenager, their parents become idiots who have absolutely no clue how the world operates. 

I’m not saying I’m perfect; I’m definitely guilty of doing and saying things that may make others cringe.  I cuss like a sailor.  I tell naughty jokes.  I drink beers.  I am honest with all my kids about the experiences I have had, in hopes that they will be discouraged from going down the same path.  At least I am crossing my fingers and wishing this is the case.  I believe that if parents present themselves as humans as well, that the kids will understand the boundaries.  If parents act holier than thou, and like they have never EVER stepped a toe out of line, I feel it is not realistic.  Kids need to see their parents as humans.  They need to be aware of parents’ shortcomings from time to time.  Sure, they can be spared the details of the back-seat deflowering.  But they can instead be told that Mom made mistakes while she was young, and it was hard to overcome the consequences associated with those mistakes.  But I digress…

I’m hoping this won’t be a “Mommy” blog.  I definitely will be talking about the kids periodically, but I will not be all “OH MY GOSH, Junior said the FUNNIEST thing today while he was poo-ing”.  Um, No.  That will not be me.

This is a place for me to talk privately about things, and to vent anonymously without (hopefully) hurting anyone’s feelings.

So, enjoy.  Bookmark if you will.  And say hi!! 🙂


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